‘Helicopter parents’ hinder the development of their children

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‘Helicopter parents’ hinder the development of their children

Parents should guide and supervise their children, but allowing them to become independent as soon as possible, depending on their age and capabilities.

Experts warn that in recent years it has increased a trend among parents that consists of overprotect their children, avoiding them any difficulty or risk, something that not only does not benefit them, but that prevents them to properly develop their personality, and does not learn to deal with problems or to be self-employed or responsible for its acts and decisions. The phenomenon has been called ‘helicopter parents’, and characterized a type of parents whose way of educating is to combine the overprotection with excessive control and a high demand that leads them to promote competitiveness in children.

Over-protected children may have less initiative and low motivation for studies, often refusing to acknowledge their mistakes, and are not liable for their acts or their own well-being

As says Lilia marine, child psychiatrist of the service of Psychiatry and psychology clinic of the Hospital Universitario HM Puerta del Sur, the consequence of this excessive concern of parents for their children’s future since they are very small, and the desire to have best immediately, is that they end up by protecting them from life, instead of preparing them to deal with it.

Children educated in this way may have less initiative and low motivation for studies, and not well develop their creativity. In addition, often refusing to acknowledge their mistakes, their frustration tolerance is very low, and don’t become responsible for their actions or for their own well-being, becoming irritated or react aggressively if the people around not heed their wishes.

Dr. Marinas has explained that it is suitable to scold children when we want to correct a misconduct, explaining the reasons why are established limits, although it points out that learning is most effective if the child assumes a natural consequence of his behavior, for example, if it does not complete homework or a task that must be made in time You may not go to the park or play with his friends.

This expert encourages parents to allow their children make mistake, because mistakes – he says – are an important source of learning, and children must be wrong. Therefore, it sends the message that support that should be paid in the case of the duties, is not to make them for them so that they make better grades, but teach them to organize, manage your time, answer any questions… concrete, and reduce this support according to the child acquires autonomy.

And also recommended that guide and monitor children, but allow them to be independent as soon as possible, according to their capacities (from 2 – 3 years may start to eat and get dressed alone; and before the 6 must enjoy playing alone and with other children, sort their toys, and be autonomous for washing, dressing, eating…). Finally, the doctor advised that parents and children perform activities separately from time to time, since this helps to care for the couple and the children earn in independence, which also benefits them.

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